Marcela

Look at this woman. How can you not just love her immediately? Not only is she gorgeous, she’s warm and generous and a fucking force of nature.

Marcela was suggested to me as someone who could help me with a few of the bureaucratic hurdles that come with having/renovating a home in a foreign country. I’d been told that “getting gas connected in Italy is like trying to get an audience with the Pope,” which didn’t sound too promising, so I was like, YES, hook me up with this woman. She worked her magic and not only got the gas turned on but set it up to auto pay from my account and have all emails from the gas company go to her, not me, so she would know if there were any problems. I mean, really? That is over and beyond. Side note: Our upstairs neighbors have been trying to get their gas turned on for four years. Four years. And now there are no more gas connections available in the area, so I feel extremely lucky and grateful.

As lucky and grateful as I am to have a gas connection, knowing Marcela has been the real good fortune. One of the first times I got to sit down and just chat with her, she told me that what she would really love to do in her life is to help an impoverished village in Cambodia. I asked her what has inspired that dream and she told me that when she was a little girl in Albania, the village she lived in was so poor that none of the children had any shoes or toys. A Greek couple with money visited her town and after seeing all the kids, they went shoe-less for the rest of their visit so that no one would feel bad. When they left, they took measurements and sizes for every child and then they came back with clothes, shoes and toys for everyone. It was such a joyful event in the town that Marcela remembers all the details even though she was small. This couple brought her a doll that she named Nini and loved fiercely. It was because of them that Marcela and her family ended up moving to Greece where she spent her adolescence. I wonder if these people know the results of their generosity and humanity. I wonder if they know how they are remembered and talked about.

Marcela moved to Italy from Greece against her parents wishes at 18 years old. Her older sister had already moved there and was married and settled. Together they cooked up a plan for Marcela to come for a “visit” and then just not go back. She packed everything that was most important to her in two suitcases. One was mostly full of books but she had to pretend it wasn’t heavy so her parents wouldn’t suspect that she was planning to stay. She had spent all her money on the plane ticket and when she got to the airport she was told that the heavy suitcase was going to cost an extra 50 euros. She had no money and no idea what to do. She rifled through her coat even though she knew she wouldn’t find anything. And what do you think? She pulled out 50 euros that her uncle had slipped in her pocket while saying goodbye. She got on the plane and never went back to Greece.

On my visit last month, Marcela invited me to have a drink with her. I told her about this project and I asked about her positivity and how she is so open and loving. She told me that she didn’t used to be that way. I find that pretty much impossible to believe, but she insisted that it was true. She told me that she had an experience as a young mother that changed her. Marcela got married very young, at 18 or 19 I think, and had two kids right away. She is divorced now but she and her ex-husband had a garlic farm and a restaurant in the next town over and they worked incredibly hard to make it a success. When their daughter was two years old she got sick. She had hurt her arm a few days before while playing with her brother but no one thought much about it. The daughter had a fever that kept getting worse but the doctor thought it was no big deal. Marcela took her to the hospital for another opinion and was told that is was just a virus and she would be fine. She knew that something wasn’t right but her husband and mother-in-law thought she was over reacting. The baby got sicker and Marcela’s friend drove them to a children’s hospital in the city an hour and a half away. When the doctors at that hospital examined the baby they said that she had a strep infection that had settled in the hurt arm and was eating away at it. They told Marcela that if she had brought her in a day later her daughter would have lost her arm. They were in the hospital for a month. This is a crazy and amazing story but Marcela said that being in the hospital all that time with families whose kids wouldn’t get well changed her outlook on life.

Shit. I think we all need a breath after that story. I, for one, could use to take a lesson from this.

So, Marcela and I were at the cafe and she was telling me this incredibly intense story, and then she suddenly asked what I was doing for dinner. I hadn’t made a plan and thought I’d just go get a pizza or something but she insisted I come home with her, that I just couldn’t eat alone. We sat in her tiny, cozy apartment and ate stuffed eggplant that her mom had cooked and cheese with honey from her cousin’s bees (her whole immediate family and lots of cousins now live in the area). There was also a huge tomato salad, rye crisp and a few yummy fritter-y things that she pulled from the freezer and warmed up in her little toaster oven. I’ve learned that all it takes for Marcela to really let loose with the gossip is one or two seemingly innocent questions which I not-so-innocently provided. I got filled in on SO much news from town – who owns a gun, who’s in trouble with the law, who dumped who, who’s a good person but hangs out with lowlifes, what everyone says about everyone else behind their backs. It was highly entertaining and I think some of it might even be true. The lovely teenaged daughter, with her two working arms, joined us for some food, but she was less interested in the gossip than I was. I got the feeling that she has maybe heard some of it before.

The last thing I want to say about Marcela is that she is starting a business and I couldn’t be happier for her. Right now she works crazy hours at a shopping bag factory and she manages a few rental properties, including mine, on the side for extra money. I have been telling her that she needs to be putting her energy into the rentals because she is so good at it and such a people person. But she is a single mom and has been really afraid to give up her regular income, which I can totally understand. Apparently I am not the only friend who has been encouraging her to do this though, and her eyes were sparkly with excitement when she told me the news that she is leaving her factory job at the end of the year. I believe in her whole-heartedly and I am so proud of her. Sweet lady, you deserve every happiness life has to offer.

Last meal It was hard for me to get Marcela to answer this question. She kept saying that she doesn’t care as long as all the people she loves are there. After a bit of prodding she told me this:

Fish, shrimp and white wine on the beach with a fire and all her friends and family.

But I have seen Marcela eat and I know she will want more than that so I am adding a few things I know she loves to the menu.

Tomatoes with balsamic vinegar, olive oil and salt

Parmesano Reggiano drizzled with honey

Barbaresco